Ah, Life…

 Sometimes, it feels like  just when you’ve found a nice comfy straight road life likes to throw in some curves and sharp turns to throw you off.   Ok so I know that ‘life’ isn’t really in control of the trials we go through, but the terminology fits for how I feel.

Less than a month ago I was happy with life. I have J and the Kids and we’re back in Texas and God has restored so much to me!  I was thankful, content and excited about my life. Which until recently aren’t things I had felt in regards to my life in quite some time.  Just as I was reveling in the awesomeness that is my life, in one day  all of it seemed to have turned around. It litterally felt like my world was confined in a snowglobe and God just decided to pick it up and shake it around.

 Everything I knew for the past 27 years was shattered into a gazillion pieces and while I didn’t feel that I had been abandoned by God, I didn’t feel he was very nearby either. Thankfully I feel that I have been able to push through my lonliness. I don’t think I would have been able to do that if it weren’t for my amazing, supportive Husband and my awesome friends who have been there to encourage and uplift me.

 I still feel, to an extent, that every once in a while God picks up my world and shakes it around a little bit. Today I think, was one of the worst days. However I also believe that it’s not Him being malicious. We learn from the things that hurt us. Whether or not we learn something that is beneficial to us or detramental to us relies soley on whether or not we turn to God for direction and comfort or turn towards ourselves.

I am determined that I am going to continue pressing into Him and finding my comfot in Him. I am also learning to lean on J more and more. I find myself finding solace in my crafts. They help me clear my mind and focus on things that are going on around me.

Through the LORD’s mercies we are not consumed, Because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness. Lamentations 3:22, 23

But I will sing of Your power; Yes, I will sing aloud of Your mercy in the morning; For You have been my defense And refuge in the day of my trouble. Psalm 59:16

Where can I go from Your Spirit? Or where can I flee from Your presence? If I ascend into heaven, You are there; if I make my bed in hell, behold, You are there. If I take the wings of the morning,And dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there Your hand shall lead me, and Your right hand shall hold me. Psalm 139:7-10

Where can I go from Your Spirit? Or where can I flee from Your presence? If I ascend into heaven, You are there; if I make my bed in hell, behold, You are there. If I take the wings of the morning,And dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there Your hand shall lead me, and Your right hand shall hold me. Psalm 139:7-10

Though I walk in the midst of trouble, You will revive me; You will stretch out Your hand Against the wrath of my enemies, And Your right hand will save me. Psalm 138:7

<3 Mama